Lesson learned.

Those who know me know that I'm not exactly "censored" when I speak. The only times you can really find me NOT using curse words are (a) when I'm teaching, (b) when I'm around little children (but not my own), and (c) when I'm asleep.

And who knows, maybe I use foul language in my sleep - Tom has told me I talk in my sleep before.

When Thad was first born, people were constantly telling me and Tom that we needed to tone down the cursing.

"He will pick up on everything he hears," they would say.

To which we would reply, "Well, the first time it happens, he will understand why it can never happen again."

We thought we were brilliant.

Our child would be the first child on the block to use appropriate manners, and know when and when not to use words like asshole, shit and - my personal favorite - douche canoe.

Another thing we consistently do in this family is tease. Tease, tease, tease.

Thaddeus is a silly butt.

Mommy is a dork.

Daddy is a poopy McDonald's happy meal with chicken mcnuggets and fries (Thad came up with that one, not me).

We never thought to think that he wouldn't understand not to use these words outside of the home.

So we suddenly have little kids consistently ringing our doorbell for the past couple of months, "Um, hi. Thaddeus just called me stupid."

"Um, Thaddeus's mom? Thaddeus told me that I'm a poopy face."

"Thaddeus just used a bad word!"

Sigh.

Parenting fail.

Recently, a family with 5 kids moved in next door. Four girls and one boy. The sweetest little kids. They hang out outside, and Thad has started to play with them.

Literally on the first day, one of them came to me - tears in her eyes - and said, "He just told me that if I wasn't his friend, he would kill me."

Oh man. 

Oh man, oh man, oh man.

I didn't even know how to respond to that.

So now we are working to reverse the effects of our potty mouths/teasing games. It sucks - because it's who we are - but it only took me nearly 4 years to figure out that it doesn't matter that it's who we are. It's not the person we want our toddler to be.

Poor Thad.

He's probably so confused. But, I figure it's for the best.

Oh, and for those of you who have babies - or will soon - please just trust me on this.

You can teach your child that only certain words are allowed when used by ADULTS, but that doesn't mean much. It really only means that they will be smart enough not to use them around YOU.

Another sigh.