California.

The State of California seriously needs to take a moment, step back, and breathe.

First the Happy Meal, and now a ban on plastic bags?

Here's an idea, Golden State: Stop worrying about petty shit, and start worrying about something important.

Like the fact that your air in Los Angeles contains just enough hazardous particles to kill off an entire country of 8-foot men.

Or the fact that you are officially a minority majority state and that status is bleeding you white.

Or the fact that you're in debt up to the top of the Golden Gate bridge, and there is no end in site.

Or the fact that you failed to legalize pot, but having done so could have helped with your massive deficit.

Ok.

That's all I'm going to say about that.

Now, on to other matters. More important matters---the show Sons of Anarchy.

Do you watch it?

Because I do. And I love it. It's quite possibly one of the greatest shows on television.

However...this whole "Jacks can't find his kid, and we're running around Ireland like a bunch of fools" theme is getting a little old.

Find the kid already.

Change the theme music.

And come back to America so I can begin to understand what in the hell you all are saying.

Please and thank you. ;)

In case you're wondering, yes, I'm a little stressed. Lol.

See this handsome little guy in the picture?

He's super cute, right? Gorgeous blue eyes. Clearly well dressed. ;)

Well, he's also on the down-swing of the behavioral pendulum. We were up for awhile. And for awhile, it was really nice. But he came crashing down recently, and he came crashing down hard.

This child is giving me a serious run for my money lately.

I never thought I'd be that mom, but I totally am.

Some of the things that seem to be pouring out of my mouth these days include:

"There is no way Santa is coming to our house this year. He is just going to fly right by."

"1...2...I better not get to three, young man...3."

"Thaddeus, you cannot hit Mystic with your sword. That hurts her."

"Did you just tell me to shut up!?"

"Thaddeus, you cannot just hit people because they make you mad. Punching mommy in the back of the head because she won't let you have a toy is not appropriate."

"Time out!"

"No, you cannot have a piece of chocolate for breakfast."

"Why, why, why can you not pee and poop in the potty like a big boy!?"

"Thaddeus, please don't throw buckets of water out of the tub. This isn't a community pool. It's a bathroom."

* * *

Remember that movie with John Ritter and the little red-headed boy that he adopted? I can't remember what it was called. Anyways, that is what my household reminds me of these days--that movie.

Don't get me wrong, it's mildly entertaining having a wild little boy running around these parts--despite being totally exhausting.

And it makes for some really good stories...

Like the other night, when Tom was in the kitchen making Thad his dinner.

Thad was running around with his sword, and his knight's helmet on. He's really into dragons lately, and always wants to watch the movie How to Train Your Dragon.

Anyways, apparently he ran right into the kitchen, raised his sword, and screamed, "DRAGON SLAYER!!!"

It caught Tom totally off guard, which meant he had absolutely no time to...ahem...protect himself.

And yes, Tom took a sword hit right to his man parts.

And even now, about a week later, I still can't decide if the story makes me laugh because it's just frickin' hilarious, or if it makes me mad because I wasn't there to witness it.

Either way, the term 'Dragon Slayer' has taken on a whole new meaning in the Jeter household.